


Lovely

by iwritesinsandtragedies (kyhssmepsj69)



Series: deysicc one shots [1]
Category: Day6 (Band)
Genre: Angst, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-29
Updated: 2019-10-29
Packaged: 2021-01-08 00:08:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 986
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21226517
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kyhssmepsj69/pseuds/iwritesinsandtragedies
Summary: Isn't it lovely, all alone?Heart made of glass, my mind of stoneTear me to pieces, skin and boneHello, welcome home





	Lovely

**Author's Note:**

> made this random one shot while listening to lovely by billie eilish and khalid  
feedbacks are appreciated!
> 
> disclaimer: day6 et al belong to themselves. this is purely a work of fiction, and not in any way a reflection of the lads.  
also TRIGGER WARNING for some implications in the story. Not really of the sexual nature, but might apply to some. Mature language ahead.

I still can't forget you.

I still can't forget how I first bumped into you. I, the cautious girl, who clutched her books and heart like someone's bound to take it from her and smash it. The girl with abandonment issues and scars from the tragedy that is her life. I guess it was what drew you to me; my lifeless eyes and mumbled apology, the quick skirting around you to avoid further human interaction. Like magnets, you sensed how lonely I was, how aching. You were drawn to the brokenness inexplicably.

Or maybe I was just an easy target for fate's cruel hands.

You made it your mission to go out of your way to make me feel special, or at least that's how I saw it. Maybe I was just too starved that I wasn't able to resist. I never was. I mean, after all, this is what led me to Brian, this was why—

Nevermind.

I wasn't ready to talk about him to a stranger. You said it's okay, that you can wait.

God. Why did I fall for it?

_You are really the loveliest person I've ever met._

I'm sorry. I got distracted. Where was I?

Oh, yes. Stranger.

You weren't a stranger for long. You made it to a point to be there for me. How did you do that? How did you keep up that pretense? Did you really care? Did you really love me? Why make me jump when you have no plans of jumping with me?

Stranger to friends. You were there when life became too monotonous. Friends to best friends. You were there when life became too unbearable to live. Best friends to lovers...

Best friends to lovers.

Was it real, or was it just me? 

Best friends to lovers was the hardest transition. When I realized I was falling for you, I stayed away. A man, the gender I detested with my whole being. The one who left me when I was little, decided I was not good enough to stay for. The one who used and abused me in every way, deciding I was still not good enough. The one who made me fall for their words and touches, only for it to turn out to be an illusion.

And yet, I fell for it again. And I can't really blame myself for it.

You were there for me when everything was crumbling. You kept me safe when I was so close to jumping off the edge, wiped my tears when my mind was killing me inside out, held me close when I was thisclose to falling apart.

And then you kissed me, and I kissed you back. Then, I pulled away like I was burned from your lips and ran away like my life depended on it. You tried to run after me, but I was so used to running away that you were no match to me.

_You are really the loveliest person I've ever met._

You dropped by everyday but my door remained locked. On the day I thought you're not coming, you were there. Apparently, you never left. Why my landlord didn't kick you out, I'll never know. I guess you really have a way to make things happen when you want them to. I tried to shut the door again, but I really can't keep you out, can I?

We spent the day just talking. I told you about the male figures in my life—Brian, the others, and my dad. It was not easy talking about Brian again, much less about my dad, but I told you anyway. You told me about your own dad, and how life hasn't been easy for you either. I cried, you cried, and you didn't leave. I told you every little thing about me until I was dried out, but you didn't leave.

Everything changed after that. You vowed not to do the same, and I believed you. I felt I had finally met someone who will get it. While I was still cautious, I decided to just fuck it and trust you anyway. When you asked for more than friends, I said yes.

Everything went well. It felt like I've found my soulmate. It felt perfect.

Until it wasn't.

We started drifting apart. Maybe you started seeing that I'm more than you bargained for, I don't know. All I know is it feels like you were slipping through my hands.

I tried my hardest to change my ways, even when I didn't know what to change. I tried asking, but you always brushed it off with 'I'm tired' or 'everything's fine'.

How dumb of me.

I started questioning myself again. Maybe it was my fault. Maybe Brian was right—I will never be enough. Here you were trying to be the perfect boyfriend for an irreparable girl.

And then I saw you with her.

You didn't see me, but I did. I can see how happy you were with her. I really can't compete with that, can I? I stood there with my heart shattered until the bell rang. I walked away, feeling numb all over.

The next time I saw you, we both knew we were doomed. You knew that we're over. You said sorry, and hugged me. I smiled and kissed you one last time, then walked out like nothing ever happened. You were my best friend, after all.

Until now, I never really dated. I see you often, and I see how happy you are with her. I cannot fault you for that.

I'm sorry. I'm rambling, aren't I? This is the last, I promise.

I just want you to know that it will always be you, until my last breath.

Always you.

My eyelids are feeling heavy, and I really am not looking to fight it.

_I love you._

<strike>You are really the loveliest person I've ever met.</strike>


End file.
